Question Time 1st April 2010

Question Time this week comes from Stevenage, which is twinned with Shymkent in Kazakhstan, and location of The Pied Piper which is the only pub in the world to be opened by Her Majesty the Queen. Stevenage is represented for Labour by Daphne Barbara Follett, who is standing down at this election after overclaiming the highest amount of expenses of any MP in the country.

On the panel is ex-postman and soon to be ex-Home Secretary Alan Johnson, shadow Business Secretary Ken Clarke, broadcaster Richard Littlejohn and poker-playing Grauniad columnist Victoria Coren.

For those who wish to take part in the Biased-BBC Buzzword Bingo, we will be playing by the “April Fool Rules” meaning that anyone with enthusiastic references to “Capitalism“, “Thatcher” and “Ashcroft” on a diagonal line will be disqualified for watching a spoof show.

Once again TheEye and David Mosque will be scanning the small text for dodgy Labour statistics, and we look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 25th March

Question Time this week comes from Glasgow, home of the Red Clydeside socialist movement and not home to a Tory MP since 1982.

On the panel we have Chief Secretary Treasury and Unite member Liam Byrne MP, the Conservative Shadow Minister for Communities Baroness Warsi, the Liberal Democrat communities spokesman Julia Goldsworthy MP, the First Minister of Scotland Alex Salmond and businessman Sir Martin Sorrell.

Liam Byrne is a late replacement for Scottish Secretary Jim Murphy who has pulled out – just possibly because last time he did something significant in Glasgow it was attending a Labour Party fundraising dinner with Gordoom and Steven Purcell, who then mysteriously resigned in a cocaine and financial scandal which has oddly not gained the prominence the story deserves.

For those who wish to take part in the Biased-BBC Buzzword Bingo, we will be playing by the “Blatantly Political Budget Rules” meaning that anyone with “Spending Up“, “Taxes Up” and “Borrowing Up” on a diagonal line will win Greece, which is in much better shape than us now. Please note that for the duration of this game, living in Belize will result in your tax status being randomly targeted.

At the helm of the ship once again TheEye and David Mosque will be scanning the horizon for icebergs, and we look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 18th March

Question Time this week hails from Wythenshawe, Manchester, once the largest council estate in Europe and home to 1977 one-hit wonder punk rock band Ed Banger and the Nosebleeds.
The constituency of Wythenshawe and Sale East is represented by Labour MP Paul Goggins who has a majority of 10,827. Labour have polled over 50% of the vote here in the last three General Elections.

On the panel we have former foreign secretary Margaret Beckett, shadow Health Secretary Andrew Lansley, the unbeatable David Starkey, Charles *hic* Kennedy and Green Party eco-loon Caroline Lucas.

For those who wish to take part in the Biased-BBC Buzzword Bingo, we will be playing by the “Trolley Dolly Rules” meaning that anyone with “Labour“, “Unite” and “Money” on a line will win a fortnight camped in the Departure Lounge at Heathrow. Please note that for the duration of this game the No Smoking Light is OFF, complimentary alcohol and peanuts will be served by your B-BBC stewardesses and you may leave your seats at any time.

In the moderating control tower once again TheEye and David Mosque will be watching the radar screens, and we look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 11th March 2010

Question Time comes from Dewsbury, which is represented by Muslim MP, Shahid Malik and has been a Labour seat since 1935. Sayeeda (now Baroness) Warsi was 4,615 votes adrift in 2005.

On the panel so far we have Monty Don, who as a male makes him a plant, Caroline Flint, Justine Greening and Jo Swinson.

Please join moderators TheEye and David Mosque here at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 11th March 2010

Question Time this week is one which will arouse passions of various types, for we have an all wimmin audience to mark International Women’s Week. There will be chaos in the car park.

It comes from Dewsbury, which is represented by Muslim MP, Shahid Malik and has been a Labour seat since 1935. Sayeeda (now Baroness) Warsi was 4,615 votes adrift in 2005.

On the panel so far we have Monty Don, who as a male makes him a plant, Caroline Flint, Justine Greening and Jo Swinson.

For those who wish to take part in the Biased-BBC Buzzword Bingo, we will be playing by the “XX Chromosome Rules” meaning that anyone with “Chairman“, “Ombudsman” or “Serviceman” on a line will be taken to a re-education camp, and those with both “Harman” and “Hypocrite” may nominate their spouse to become an MP. Players blaming Lady Thatcher for holding back the rise of wimmin miss a turn.

A testosterone-fuelled moderators box will be manned by TheEye and David Mosque, and we look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 4th March 2010

Question Time this week comes from London and the panel is Mayor of London Boris Johnson, Lord Adonis, Shirley Williams, Carol Vorderman and Will Self.

We look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 4th March 2010

Question Time this week comes from London; soon to be the first city in the world to host the Summer Olympics three times. So don’t expect any questions on how much money that will lose.

The panel is Mayor of London Boris Johnson, the improbably named Lord Adonis, BBC favourite Shirley Williams, AllSeeingEye’s childhood fantasy Carol Vorderman and the mind-numbingly smug Will Self.

For those who wish to take part in the Biased-BBC Buzzword Bingo, we will be playing by the “One Foot In The Grave Rules” meaning that anyone with “Hero“, “Principled” or “Idealism” on any line will win a guided tour of Broadcasting House by an impartial newsreader of your choice, and those with “Ashcroft” in any corner should play their Joker early. Players must be fully domiciled in the UK for tax purposes unless they support Labour.

TheEye will be joined again by the excellent David Mosque in the Moderators’ Box, and we look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.

Question Time 25th February

Question Time this week comes from 2009 European City of Sport, Cardiff.

The panel is perma-tanned oxygen thief Peter Hain, the Shadow Defence Secretary Dr Liam Fox MP, the Plaid Cymru leader Elfyn Llwyd MP, UKIP’s Nigel Farage MEP and the unspeakably awful Janet Street Porter.

Question Time 25th February

Question Time this week comes from 2009 European City of Sport, Cardiff.

The panel is perma-tanned oxygen thief Peter Hain, the Shadow Defence Secretary Dr Liam Fox MP, the Plaid Cymru leader Elfyn Llwyd MP, UKIP’s Nigel Farage MEP and the unspeakably awful Janet Street Porter.

For those who wish to take part in the Biased-BBC Buzzword Bingo, we will be playing by the “Flying Nokia Rules” meaning that anyone with “Bully“, “Unfit To Govern” or “Mental” on their cards won’t get their question asked, and those with “Narrowing Opinion Polls” in any corner should play their Joker early. Players needing assistance may make an anonymous telephone call, but it may later be reported on television.

TheEye will be joined again by the excellent David Mosque in the Moderators’ Box, and we look forward to the pleasure of your company at 10:30pm UK time.