Start the Week 28 September 2020

Welcome to a world of fantasy . Paul Dacre in charge of OFCOM and Lord Charles Moore as Chairman of the BBC . Obviously neither of these appointments could be made by a Tory Government with an 80 majority – right ?

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383 Responses to Start the Week 28 September 2020

  1. taffman says:

    More ‘beach landing’s at Dover this morning .
    Al Beeb?
    Tory Government?
    Priti ?
    Border Farce ?
    All this when the people in this country are in lockdown . I expect more illegals will be brought in under the cover of ‘lockdown’.


  2. fakenewswatcher says:

    I did like the “impartiality” of Jim Naughtie on Toady, this morning, discussing the US presidential debate.
    He could barely conceal his hatred for President Trump and approval of Joe Biden.
    A ‘pugilist’, facing a decent, quiet fellow, apparently.
    Nothing about the latter’s associates burning, smashing up, and looting US cities. All about taxes and money spent on hair.
    Typical R4 stuff, really.


  3. Up2snuff says:

    TOADY Watch #1 – Keep that Diana Versity going!

    I listened to most of an hour and a half but turned off and on once in protest. But the final Off Switch moment was when Mishal was doing an item on a female painter from a couple of centuries back. No problem with females. No problem with female artists. But the first thing Mishal said presented this woman as a victim.

    I’m getting fed up with the constant succession of weak, helpless, feeble, complaining women that the BBC trail across the Radio 4 airwaves to me. Even modern ones who are considered intelligent enough to get into a UK University to study for a degree. Constantly falling and failing snowflakes.

    It is up to my ears.

    Too much.


  4. Guest Who says:

    Should any wonder where those hundreds of investigative geniuses in the w1a cubicle gardens get their scoops from…


  5. Thoughtful says:

    Here’s a thought which was brought to my attention recently.

    Where I live the Covid infection rate per 100 000 is around 130 roughly, given the size of the population it means around just 300 people are infected.

    According to the governments covid map, the vast majority of these people are Pakistani Muslims – for some reason the Bangladeshi Muslims are nowhere near as badly affected.

    If the Pakistani Muslims were removed from the covid statistics the infection rate would probably be below 50.

    Seeing as many towns in the North of England have a similar situation why the hell is the cowardly Boris the Bottler putting a curfew on pubs when Muslims don’t go into pubs? Why is one of the greatest infection spreaders in their area, the Mosques unaffected and allowed to continue business as usual?

    It is from data like this we can ourselves calculate that either the cowardly useless incompetent Tories are behaving to type, or there is some kind of sinister plan of mass control going on.


    • Up2snuff says:

      T, that’s interesting. When PH(E) did that funny study with a Uni back in the early summer, they found the opposite. I remember that the BBC made a colossal fuss about it.

      BAMEs from Banglandhesh were the most likely to die, more than Pakistanis, Chinese and Africans. Study was done across UK:

      “An analysis of survival among confirmed COVID-19 cases and using more detailed ethnic groups, shows that after accounting for the effect of sex, age, deprivation and region, people of Bangladeshi ethnicity had around twice the risk of death than people of White British ethnicity. People of Chinese, Indian, Pakistani, Other Asian, Caribbean and Other Black ethnicity had between 10 and 50% higher risk of death when compared to White British.”


      • Thoughtful says:

        No that’s not the opposite it’s still the same. We are talking here about infection rates not deaths, and the Bangladeshis are clearly being more careful.

        There is a second point to make from this, and that is about the lies the Labour party has told concerning the reasons why so many Muslims have become infected, and the Labour lie it’s because of large families and so called deprivation.

        Well if that were true the figures across Pakistani and Bangladeshi would be roughly the same, the fact that the Pakistani areas are massively higher than anywhere else proves this to be false.


  6. Guest Who says:

    The utter desperation of media on both sides of the pond, in two tweets.

    And their core audience*.

    *Also BBC rota guy with Owen and Champion Ash.


  7. Guest Who says:

    Lewis hot on the high heels of colleague BS in the editorial integrity stakes.

    I wonder if Newsnight might eventually notice the context to the Boom! OMG! Blockbuster! story they are all RTing from the NYT still?

    Say… December?


  8. Up2snuff says:

    An interesting BBC programme – at last – on the subject of Covid-19 but more specifically ‘long Covid’. Adam Rutherford (‘Inside Science’ presenter) is a sufferer.

    The programme is repeated @ 16.00 hrs on R4 today


    • Roland Deschain says:

      Is “long Covid” any more than a manifestation of the well-documented post-viral fatigue syndrome?


  9. StewGreen says:

    Via Norman Brennan


  10. StewGreen says:

    GuestWho you posted a BBC tweet about shopworkers
    The full tweet did load
    It just took a couple of seconds load.

    Generally here it’s convenient to post the URL of a Reply to a tweet cos that causes autoembed of both the reply and parent tweet.
    However that is a pain in the ass if you just want to post the reply.
    In that case it’s better to grab the words in that tweet.

    However I think when I view this site on my phone, it just loads the one tweet not both
    Is that right ?

    But it is a


    • Guest Who says:

      …case where the tension is killing me?


      I was more making the point that when folk are scanning tweets, those tinkers at the BBc may not be above crafting the upper, visible bit to snag the outrage of any not clicking to get the full context that appears.

      The same with “quote” headlines vs. captions on other social media.

      “Donald Trump gooses nuns!”

      [crafty image]

      According to sources to close to Jon Sopel’s parrot, it is alleged the President gooses nuns.

      Full ‘analysis’ in link.


      • Guest Who says:

        To be fair, the Fail can go much better.

        St. Saline preserve us!


      • StewGreen says:

        Doh of course BBC tweet headlines are outrage-bait
        Most people don’t read the actual story
        they form a strong opinion on the tweet headline alone

        I don’t get what you say about the second part of a tweet missing.

        BTW Those clickbait bits can be changed AFTER the tweet has sat for a while
        So the headline is held not inside the tweet, but inside the original webpage
        So if it is stealth edited the tweet gets changed. with a refresh delay.


  11. Kaiser says:

    Feroze Khushi: Essex say education on diversity needed after beer poured on Muslim batsman

    I wonder who actually objected here

    see the picture , does he look bothered

    their shop keepers dont object to selling it

    I presume alcohol based wipes and disinfectants are ok , so long as you dont drink them

    I suspect some woke offence archaeologist saw the picture did some digging and made a story of it.

    I wonder if they are employed at the so called BBC.

    Now wheres last weeks story of discrimination, when the muslim wasn’t given the alcohol gone again.


  12. pugnazious says:

    LOL…nothing to do with the BBC [I hope…maybe they produced it for him in their own time!]….looking at ‘Biggus Dickus – Monty Python, Life of Brian.’ on Youtube and the opening ad was Keir Starmer’s conference speech with a lovely video telling us how much he loves this country. Cosmic resonance Rodney.

    Of course the ads are random, personalisation turned off, so you won’t see the same thing, lucky you, but why waste a chance to play the classic video?


  13. Eddy Booth says:

    Greggs staff face fewer hours or losing their jobs

    ‘ “Staff at around half of Greggs’ stores will have to accept fewer hours or face losing their jobs as the government’s furlough scheme comes to an end.
    The bakery chain, which employs 25,000 workers, expects business activity to “remain below normal for the foreseeable future” ‘

    Greg’s couldn’t be bothered to open during the lock down, as other highsteet bakers did, and help feed the nation. They just took furlough benefits handouts instead.
    For that reason I haven’t been back in since they reopopned.
    Oh, now they’re struggling!
    Cry me a sausage roll.


  14. Guest Who says:

    I will click both next to find out if this is for real, or another ‘strong memo follows’ #prasnews effort from the overpaid market rate top floor.

    Best I can imagine is requiring them to remove BBC branding which, after decades using it to secure the following, is cute, not in a good way, if cynical. So perfect BBC.


    • Guest Who says:

      A twofer.

      The second part of the second tweet was not visible.

      However…. #plottwist…


  15. StewGreen says:

    More Woke-months
    March is Women’s History Month.”

    “April is Celebrate Diversity Month”

    June is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month
    The last Sunday in June is Gay Pride Day.
    (That different to LGBT History month in Feb or Oct)

    June 19: Juneteenth, also known as Freedom Day or Emancipation Day. It is observed as a public holiday in 14 U.S. states. This celebration honors the day in 1865 when slaves in Texas and Louisiana finally heard they were free, two months after the end of the Civil War. J


    • Up2snuff says:

      Thanks to Guest Who, I now know that October is also FrOtober month. Something to do with BAME hair apparently …..


      • Guest Who says:

        Should this massive story dominate BBC home pages over the coming week, as may happen, i feel I should get an award. I will wear my best frock.

        Maybe a Tat or QC spread.


  16. pugnazious says:

    So Tim Davie threatens to remove BBC starlets from social media if they breach impartiality rules…..

    ‘Mr Davie, told the House of Commons Culture Committee today: ‘In my view party political statements are not the right thing for people to be making if they are part of an impartial news organisation.”

    Might prefer it if he removed them from their jobs when they breach impartiality rules when actually working on the BBC….of course that would leave the stable pretty bare.

    Apart from that it has to be doubtful he would ever carry out the threat….the BBC making absolutely no apology for the ‘Kill whitey’ remark….if it had been ‘Kill darkie’?


  17. G.W.F. says:



  18. StewGreen says:

    Blast from 2016

    “Jones believes he was punished because he tried to expose the Jimmy Savile scandal at the BBC and spoke out about the way his Newsnight investigation of December 2011 was suppressed.

    Liz MacKean, who worked on the Savile story with Jones, left after 23 years with the corporation in April last year. She also felt she no longer had a future with the BBC.”


  19. Guest Who says:

    This guy is not a Trump groupie, but BBC American BS might not RT this given they would need to lock the studio door and never return.


  20. vlad says:

    Savour this…

    BBC Finished! End IS Nigh – Amazing News This Week!!!


    • StewGreen says:

      Belfield is one for hyperbolic headline

      “Paul Darkri” … it’s Dacre as in acre


      • theleftwilleatitself says:

        I thought it was Daiquiri as in ‘pink’ 🤔
        I mean Maitlis is Maitlisssss 😉


        • Up2snuff says:

          tlwei, what? Like hissing Sid, the tempter in Jungle Book, and that other well-known lizard that lost his legs?


  21. Guest Who says:


    Katty risking expulsion from the peroxide club.


  22. BRISSLES says:

    Had to switch off from listening to all the students whingeing and whining about ‘how they are all having to look after one another’, and how they are all being badly done by.

    How old are they , 12 ???? Dear God, this is the generation who will be ‘responsible’ for Gt Britain in a few years time.

    And the public think we’ve got problems now !!!!


    • Deborah says:

      Mr D has a suggestion for these poor locked in students. Perhaps they could do some studying, isn’t that what they went to university for?


  23. Kaiser says:


    • StewGreen says:

      Of course the Sadiq photo is staged
      Most PR photos are. The photographer takes 20 shots picks the best one.
      Then he leaves and the actual injection is done.

      The original
      See the injector is a tiny part of the pic


    • Up2snuff says:


      Where is the alcohol swab? That should be done first, to prepare the injection site before the injection. And where is the second alcohol swab? That needs to be swept across the injection site as the needle is withdrawn otherwise both the Mayor of London and the doctor or nurse are likely to catch influenza.

      Tut tut!


  24. Docmarooned says:

    Brissles. Agree. They are a bunch of snowflakes. However given the IQ’s of our current parliament probably not much different.


  25. Deborah says:

    Call me old fashioned but the programme announced by the BBC just before the 6pm BBC1 news appears to be in poor taste and may I suggest highlight the paucity of ideas in BBC programming.

    Apparently on BBC3 is a dating programme for people to date new people if their present relationship isn’t going well. Naive maybe, but I recommend one relationship at a time and not dating with the tv cameras rolling to record a new relationship.

    I wonder what the viewing figures are.


    • StewGreen says:

      \\ A dating show with a difference,
      one couple, whose relationship is in need of help, date someone new for one night only.
      They’ll then decide if they’re going to stick together or split forever.
      (This series was filmed before the Government and medical guidelines for coronavirus were implemented.) //


    • StewGreen says:

      Deborah coming next year to BBC three … probably

      “One man And His Dog-ging Wife”


  26. StewGreen says:

    5:35pm switched on Radio Humberside and got this item about Hull Welcome House refugee centre shoved at me.

    Then a trailer for more BAME womens prog tonight
    “Award winning Amanda Foster on how she became Britain’s first black stunt woman”
    The Sista Collective
    Evenings on BBC Radio Humberside
    Hollywood, stunts and life as a single mum. Award winning Amanda Foster on how she became Britain’s first black stunt woman.
    Letitia George, Aminata Kamara and Simone Riley join Jessie Aru-Phillips for the #SisCollective.

    Are there really that many black people in Hull ?
    Ah no it’s a national BBC podcast used as a filler.


  27. StewGreen says:

    ITV local news
    item on a schools “run a day” track

    3 kids chosen to speak, only one white

    BBC local news and in first item , they chose to feature TV doctor, Dr Amir.


    • Guest Who says:

      And Lewis.


      • theleftwilleatitself says:

        No, you’re not a normal person Lewis, you’re a bubble dweller that is so far out of touch with the rest of us you’re hopefully getting your P45 soon 👍🏻
        Activist, not journalist ✅


  28. Guest Who says:

    Boris is not performing well, but this seems overt as ‘reporting’.


    • Up2snuff says:

      Guest, I guess the first people to grumble if we had a very simple totally clear lockdown imposed by the PM across the whole of the UK ….

      ……. would be the BBC and ‘Part-time’ along with the TOADY Presenters.


  29. Up2snuff says:

    Apologies if I misled anyone, the Adam Rutherford ‘Long Covid’ programme was not repeated this p.m. @ 16.00hrs. Either I didn’t read the page on the BBC web-site carefully enough or the prog was pulled for some reason and Peter White’s NTNT put in its place.

    You will have to wait breathlessly for the ‘Long Covid’ repeat; it is 16.00hrs on 13 October 2020.

    Try not to expire in the meantime.


  30. Guest Who says:

    Lurch running interference?


  31. Guest Who says:

    Sky meanwhile crafting its headlines with care.


  32. Guest Who says:

    Maybe the raft of cubicle gardens ‘health correspondents’ could ‘analyse’ such data?


  33. Fedup2 says:

    If you are interested in US politics set the video for 0200 for the Trump Biden debate – dont forget the popcorn .

    Will joe remember his name ? His country ?


  34. Up2snuff says:

    There was a story that was put about by environmental campaigners and other believers in Global Warming and Climate Change some years ago that we who do not agree with their view of AGW & CC (the majority of people in the UK?) have been ‘got at’ by the oil companies and some of their covert and overt propaganda.

    It is interesting to see that this story has been resurrected recently and is now being promoted by the BBC.

    In the unlikely event that anyone of those AGW/CC campaigners, environmentalists and arrivistes XR or BBC people read this post, I knew the whole CO2 = AGW was nonsense from remembered science from education days. I didn’t see any oil company material (still haven’t) apart from BP’s statements about their ‘going green’ and into ‘renewables’. I certainly haven’t had any cash from an oil company.

    In fact, it was John Major insisting I hand over more cash to HM’s Treasury to prove his administration’s ‘green credentials’ that even more clearly emphasised to me the fakery of the whole thing. And when the next PM craftily turned Global Warming into Climate Change I was even more certain it was all fake.

    So there, BBC!

    What do you have to say to that?


    • JimS says:

      Can’t say I remember any material from the oil companies either.

      I do remember being given Rachel Carson’s Silent Spring as part of ‘O’ Level General Studies.

      More recently I remember BBC favourite, Richard Curtis’ ‘exploding kids’ advert.


  35. Guest Who says:

    From ITBB OT.


    Charlie • 5 hours ago •

    Julian Knight , Conservative MP and chair of Culture and Media Committee is kicking off today and says the idea of Charles Moore as BBC chair is ‘beyond the pale’.

    Julian Knight was a BBC reporter for five years before becoming an MP. Clearly a fan of the BBC and looking to protect his pension.

    Why on earth did they put a fanboy in charge of a committee where the BBC is part of its remit?

    The prevalence of BBC alumni in bbc related oversight over and over is beyond rationality.


  36. Guest Who says:

    Great to share in their activities in the wild.


    • richard D says:

      Errm, Faisal, if you had done your research better, you would have found out that it’s been reported that the first recorded use of the phrase by Biden was actually after Johnston had used it…… but never mind, I am sure you will apologise, as you do.


  37. Guest Who says:

    Via Briefings For Britain


    On Friday the BBC headline news included an item entitled: Shoppers could pay more after no-deal Brexit.

    The story was planted by the British Retail Consortium (BRC) who said that tariffs would add £3.1bn a year to the cost of importing food and drink unless the UK and the EU can strike a free trade agreement. This was a lesson in propaganda: using value rather than volume statistics; assuming the imported goods basket would remain unchanged; and the implication that some extreme percentage increases were a typical example. Towards the end of the article, the BBC admitted that this would only amount to an annual increase of £112 per household or just over £2 per week. However, the more I investigate this story, the more I believe that even this amount is questionable and that could is definitely the operative word in the BBC’s title.


    #couldfiles is a bbc staple, especially via #prasnews


    • richard D says:

      Following up on your point, Guest Who, in the middle of the week, the BBC announced, several times, in the ‘Today’ programme one morning, that there would be ‘massive’ tarrifs on food coming into the UK – even up to 50% for……..specifically, minced beef and Cheddar cheese…… Really ? I’m pretty sure we can produce mince and Cheddar in the UK, and not have to import it from the EU…. but, as usual, Faisal Islam was reported as pretty much being aghast at the news.

      It’s in their DNA, and they can’t even see it.


      • Kaiser says:

        how does that work , we apply/choose tariffs to imports


        • richard D says:

          Yup, Kaiser – these rises could be the effect of applying the UK Global Tarriff – the point I was making (poorly perhaps) is that no-one in their right mind would pay 50% more for EU-produced Cheddar cheese….. but if these scare-mongers are using these numbers to calculate how much more consumers would have to pay for their shopping, they’re fundamentally saying that British shoppers will simply continue to buy EU goods, rather than, for instance, buying home-produced goods, or cheaper imports from non-EU countries..


      • digg says:

        I think the BBC was aiming this scare at a particular section of society. I don’t suppose the W1A crowd eat much of either. BTW isn’t Cheddar in the UK?


    • JimS says:

      I still have the mini-white paper that the government sent to us all before we were dragged into the EEC. In it they told us that food prices would rise when we joined.

      By rights they should fall if and when we escape the EU.


      • Banania says:

        They did rise, didn’t they? A lot of them did anyway. Decimalization was the other rip-off.


  38. Guest Who says:

    Ah, well; looks like it’s a done deal.

    Especially when Jon RTs Katty RTing Lurch RTing CNN.


  39. Guest Who says:

    Quite a lot of deleting going on here; hard to get to the nub.

    Lawyers, eh? What are they like?


    • Guest Who says:

      And just when the BBC was really getting behind Dancing Terry.


    • StewGreen says:

      The nub is that Jessica demeaned an MP by calling her American
      and wrongly said foreigners can’t vote in the UK
      when Irish & Commonwealth can.
      Then went back and deleted her original nasty tweet.



      • JimS says:

        That will be the Jessica Simor that said:

        To challenge EU legislation, you need to show ‘a direct and individual concern’. This is very narrowly construed and it is practically impossible to get standing to challenge secondary legislation. In effect, judicial review of EU legislation is severely limited. In that important context, I think there is a real lack of access to justice.

        And this is from someone who worked for the EU Commission! Are they still her ‘masters’? (Probably, if she wants a pension).


      • Guest Who says:

        Happens a lot.

        She could claim the butler did it.


      • Banania says:

        Irish and Commonwealth used not be called foreigners. I think we should stick to that custom. P.M. Menzies said “I am British to my bootstraps”.


  40. Thoughtful says:

    Story here which the far Left MEN (trinity Mirror group) does its best to avoid even coming close to telling the truth!
    Suffice to say that hundreds of Muslim men turned out to a funeral knowing they weren’t supposed to be there, and Burnhams Gestapo did absolutely nothing save assist them by stopping legitimate traffic to allow them to disperse more efficiently – thus spreading the Covid even quicker!


    • StewGreen says:

      Rochdale, the council say they didn’t authorise it.
      People say Facebook has been routinely deleting comments.
      I’m guessing that’s only when people rudely posted on the actual funeral page


  41. taffman says:

    “Brexit: Government Brexit plan gets MPs’ final backing”
    “This would mean tariffs on most goods which UK businesses send to the EU, while the UK could also apply tariffs to EU goods.”
    As the EU exports more to the UK than we do to the EU, surely we gain more in the “tariffs game”?

    Furthermore, “Theresa May has said she cannot back the legislation”.
    IMHO she did not back Brexit, what changes ?


  42. Yasser Dasmibehbi says:

    General feeling from around my news sources is that Biden won the debate. I watched a bit of it and Biden seemed to be more compos mentis than I had been led to believe. Prepare for a BBC gloat


    • Guest Who says:

      BBC Moaning Emole:


      By Victoria King

      US election duel

      Coronavirus latest

      Chaotic, bad tempered and packed with personal insults – the first televised debate has taken place between Donald Trump and his White House challenger Joe Biden.

      Our North America reporter, Anthony Zurcher, felt it was the political equivalent of a food fight and it’s unlikely many voters’ minds were changed. Nevertheless, the winner, in his view, was Mr Biden – he proved he could keep his cool under pressure, although he didn’t land any killer blows, including over recent tax revelations. Mr Trump was the man who needed to shake up a race that’s tilting against him and he missed his chance.

      The biggest battles were over coronavirus, the economy, election integrity and race. Mr Biden criticised the president’s pandemic response and said Americans had grown “weaker, sicker, poorer and more divided” under his leadership. Mr Trump’s key message? He’d done more in a few years than his rival had achieved in nearly half a century in public office.

      The feistiest clashes happened when the candidates brought up their families and Mr Trump levelled accusations at his opponent’s son, Hunter. In another memorable moment, the president was challenged to denounce white supremacists, but failed to do so outright. Mr Trump also repeated his allegations that postal voting, which millions of Americans will rely on this year, is fraught with corruption and incompetence. BBC Reality Check has examined that claim and others and tried to sort fact from fiction for you.

      This was the first of three head-to-head debates – the next is on 15 October. Opinion polls indicate Mr Biden has a steady single-digit lead

      Lurch falling back on what polls ‘suggest’.

      But yes, amazingly, he called it for Joe too.

      Luckily BBC Propaganda is on hand to take any Trump claim apart as required. Sources say.


  43. Guest Who says:

    Rory and Krishnan circle what is easily checked.

    Guido chips in.


    • Guest Who says:

      Maybe Newsnight can get Nick back again as a special reporter?


  44. Scroblene says:

    Sleepless in Kent – again, I happened to listen to the whole ‘debate’ on R5 Dead…

    The highlight of the 90 minutes actually happened before they got to the podium (podia?) when Dotun took a call from a lady in Maine. She said that people she knew and many others, had already made up their minds on who was voting for whom, and that they would still be watching ‘for entertainment’.

    And that’s what it all was really. Biden did make some valid points but these were dismissed because all he did was spout the usual sort of stuff any politicians do, rather like the Liberal Democrats do here, and left himself wide open for an assault by President Trump.

    Now, if that is debate, then it’s not that famous, just a bruising match, and if any country needs a bruiser, then the US does in my opinion. They don’t deserve someone who is a passive, obsequious politician, who is unwilling to dish out a few clops when needed.

    I can’t be arsed to listen to what the BBC say today, they’ll crow and squeal all sorts of rubbish as usual. We have the chimney sweep coming later, and I have to find all the dust sheets, and also pop a beer in the fridge for lunchtime. I must also top up the decanter for Senora O’Blene, so we can have our usual post-lunchtime chat about important issues!


  45. Guest Who says:

    Yesterday the Lammy-Butler award went to Kamala.

    Today BBC NA na na faves CNN must be in the running.



  46. AsISeeIt says:

    Some have been saying it for weeks and months, let’s call time on this Chinese Flu scare.

    This poster asked of readers hereabouts whether they knew of anyone who had died of covid then asked how about anyone who had died of cancer? – so write to your MP!

    Could even some of our lily-livered covid-compliant print press be on the verge of a tipping point?

    Reason enough in the Mail: ‘A MILLION women miss vital breast screening. Revealed huge lockdown backlog means thousands could have undetected cancer’

    The ‘i’ puts a number on this unknown: ‘More than 8,000 could be living with cancer after mammograms were put on hold during Covid crisis’

    Your mother? Your wife?

    It’s a genuinely frightening figure for women which tends to put into perspective the Times headline which still suffers from the Man Flu and attempts to justify the recent restrictions: ‘Record rate of infection puts Britain on red alert, 7,000 new cases, virus hits highest daily level.’

    I’ll swap you an ‘infection’ after a dodgy swab test for cancer anyday of the week.

    The Guardian is still a staunch covid supporter, this morning bringing us Corbyn-supporting author of books for kids Michael Rosen: ‘All my certainty is gone. On surviving covid’ – He’s aged 74 (nicely beyond his traditional three score and ten, by the way) has indeed ‘survived’ and is still apparently alive and kicking and a thriving Guardianista.

    Meanwhile the Guardian would have us fret about the plants: ‘Two in five plant species face threat of extinction’ – is this a shot across the bows for vegetarians we wonder?

    It gets about as much traction on our newspaper front pages as the border wars between Greece and Turkey or between Armenia and Azerbaijan but our friend Angela Merkel is mired in scandal. The FT notices: ‘A German inquiry into why Angela Merkel lobbied for the payments group [Wirecard] after doubts were raised is likely to cast a shadow on her final months in office’

    The BBC’s line up of newspapers prioritises three titles with bungling Boris headlines and then a fourth pushing the Chinese Flu scare. Then those papers raising the cancer issue are relegated to lesser positions. All completely randomly arranged of course.

    ‘Sozzled old cads are going out of fashion’ warns the Times (not apropos the PM) but English words our under 30-year-olds no longer understand.

    Katy Balls (editor of the Spectator) turns up in the ‘i’ professing the notion: ‘Tories are spoiling for a culture war’ – believe it when you see it.

    The Express tosses conservatives a little red meat and would have us believe: ‘Priti: We’ll deport the grooming gangs’ – don’t hold your breath…

    The FT reveals: ‘Patel weighed plans to ship asylum seekers to islands in south Atlantic’ – and clearly bottled out of the idea.

    There’s a paw-city of laughs in the mainstream but the tabloid Star throws us a bone – being top dog for the “and finally” spot claiming to be: ‘Guest edited by the editor’s dog Charlie. He may well do a better job. But he’s being fur-loughed from tomorrow’