Biased BBC reader Derek provides us the 12 rules of the BBC!
- The BBC is an institution that must always be part of the public sector & funded by the licence fee,
- Any criticism of the BBC is simply the result of politicians attempting improper influence,
- High public expenditure is good: the public sector is preferable to the private sector, which by seeking the profit motive, is inherently evil,
- Margaret Thatcher was an evil woman whose policies ruined Britain: BBC spokesmen should, wherever possible, use the word “Thatcherite” disparagingly and contemptuously,
- The Murdoch empire is inherently evil and must be shown to be such at every opportunity, The Guardian, Observer and Independent are fine newspapers, whereas the others are beyond the pale.
- Left wing comedians such as Jeremy Hardy, Mark Steele, David Mitchell and Jo Brand are to be hired as much as possible by the BBC: the more obscene and offensive their output, the better the BBC likes it,
- Christians who openly wear a cross are suspect (Israelis are similarly suspect) whereas Muslims must always be granted craven levels of deference,
- High levels of immigration are good, and anyone seeking to limit uncontrolled mass immigration is racist,
- The EU is ” A GOOD THING” and people opposing it should have their views ridiculed and disparaged,
- Global warming due to man’s activities is a fact: it cannot be disputed,
- Public and Grammar schools are inherently bad whereas comprehensive schools are inherently good. Failing comprehensive schools do so because of lack of funding, political interference or being located in areas of deprivation: however their failings can never be blamed on the teaching profession,
- The state must always protect all people from any harm or misfortune irrespective of cost to the taxpayer, or their behaviour.
13. State-run health care is so wonderful that senior BBC employees get BUPA in their pay packages to free up NHS bedspace for the masses.
High levels of immigration are good, and anyone seeking to limit uncontrolled mass immigration is racist – except if immigrants start a crime wave in leafy Surbiton.
Global warming due to man’s activities is a fact: it cannot be disputed – unless it means that we have to pay for our fuel allowances.
Public and Grammar schools are inherently bad (for the plebs as they are not suitable material) . Comprehensive schools are good enough for them.
The state must always protect all people from any harm or misfortune irrespective of cost to the taxpayer, or their behaviour, unless it threatens the BBC’s license fee.
Good stuff. I would just amend a couple:
2. Any criticism of the BBC is simply the result of politicians or enemies from the Right attempting improper influence.
4. Margaret Thatcher was an evil woman whose policies ruined Britain: BBC spokesmen should, wherever possible, use the word “Thatcherite” disparagingly and contemptuously. All references to the Thatcher Era in comedies and dramas must be made in negative terms.
10. Global warming due to man’s activities is a fact: it cannot be disputed. Where appropriate, comedies, dramas, and children’s programming should include support for this agenda.
That last one is real, not just a joke or suspicion.
4. Additional: Any drama depicting the Thatcher Era must always have a radio or TV in the background from which should emanate the bad news of the day.
All references to Baroness Thatcher must always be simply and sneeringly “Thatcher”. Labour politicians must always be referred to reverently by their appropriate title: “Mr Miliband”, “Lord Kinnock”, etc.
14. The BBC must always work a left wing angle into any drama production, however subtle or obscure.
14a) Likewise with all “comedy” programming
14 Expenditure on new programming is to be avoided wherever possible – the BBC has far better things to spend money on. So keep up the diet of poor progranning and endless repeats.
15 In reporting on important political or social issues, keep a careful balance, that is – the majority of the coverage should come from interviewees who agree with the BBC’s agenda outlined above. If external interviewees are not available there should be interviews with other BBC staff who can be relied on to stick to the agenda.
16 It is immaterial that the BBC is paid for by the public. The complaints system should keep its design to delay, dodge or snuff out any criticisms, because the BBC is never wrong.
15. No government was in power 1997-2010. All the bad things happening to Britain are entirely attributable to the Tory-led coalition after 2010 or to Thatcher (see 4 above).
Not forgetting that Britain was a perfectly functional, fully employed, hard working, harmonious utopia prior to 1979.
17 Coverage of overseas affairs should maintain a BBC-style balance. Thus the UN is a blessing to mankind,, just like the EU, Republicans in the the US should always be criticised for failing to ingest properly-liberal beliefs. The Tea Party should of course be treated as a joke, a throwback to previous erroneous ideas that the Founders wanted a country of laws not of men, with annual budgets prescribed by such laws.
18 Gross over-manning is mandatory in all areas of the BBC, especially the management ranks. If in doubt, spend money on staff and buildings, not on programming.
18 Any reference to islam must be in positive terms and if criminals commit atrocities and belong to the religion of peace this should be obscured.
19 Any labour MP convicted of expense fraud should not be referred to as a Labour MP. Unless everybody else has mentioned it.
Maybe there should be just one guiding principle:
1)Come on comrades, let’s do what we like, as we’re unaccountable.
On 8.) and 9.) above:-
“The only way is Swiss: how we can regain control of our borders.
“The threat of uncontrolled immigration from new EU member states makes it clear that Britain needs to model itself on Switzerland and leave the EU.”
Wonderful idea, and we could introduce a type of direct democracy, where we sack the MP’s, and replace representative democracy with direct voting by the people on Bills in Parliament, using the internet.
But I think we would need to win a civil war between the People and Parliament first, and then when the People win, they can cut off the head of Cameron, have a debate about the implantation of direct democracy in Putney, and then the Queen could be declared the Lord Protector of Direct Democracy in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and the Commonwealth.
20) No think tank should ever be labeled “Left Wing”
21) Any background music shall be by a black artist and any music played before or after a news bulletin on any BBC radio station shall be by black artists and anyone who questions this *policy* shall be deemed a racist.
There must be at least one person of colour in every scene of every programme.
i would add no 13 to that list,all bbc presenters are told by the management they must not hold a opinion and must show impartiality and give equal time to all politacal views expressed when covering a story,but that never works does it,stephen nolan admitted last week that he struggles not to give a opinion in storys he covers,from vicky derbyshire to richard bacon they ignore the rules and often express there left wing opinions,maybe the best way to solve the lack of impartiality at the bbc is to employ equal number of presenters who both hold left wing and right wing views and opinions.fairness and balance is all we ask for.
Anyone who endorses any of the 21 points and provides evidence to back them up will be dismissed as a fool whose mind is controlled by the Daily Mail and the rest of the Tory press, and exposed as a fascist
I have just been idly watching the BBC news channel. Pointless. Little Owen Jones and another all agreeing with the newscaster about how dreadful the Tories are and how dreadful the right wing is.
Do they not realise that this is just pure propaganda? What is the point of it? Other than to make the end of the BBc ever more desirable.
22. Any outside broadcast shall show a majority of black or brown faces.
Unless it’s about immigration, when all the people and children shall be hideously white.
They should be written on two stone tablets and used to bludgeon lefties with.
Looking forward to 2015 and Britain’s last election. Not bothered if the lefties with because by 2020 we will be deep into civil war.
Two stories in the news today Kalashnikov dead and Teresa May removing British passports from people who go to Syria for weapons training… sorry, I mean playing at doctors. We can be sure that they will sneak back into the country (or have citizenship given back in 2015) with their AK47s.
LibLabCon-trick and EU types think they have the future sewn up. Anything but.
All late night movies must feature an “anti racism” message….Has anybody else noticed that?…….Whenever BBC 1 have a run of late night Movies they continually abide to a politically correct message..
Don’t forget the Christmasy Christian message of The Magdalene Sisters.
Compare and contrast with citizen khan, earlier in the day.
I wonder if they will ever make a film about those “Men” in Rochdale, Bradford, Oxford etc etc etc?
These days, they are more into remakes. Hence, coming soon to a screen near you…?
Glad to see that Turing has been given his life back…or something like that!
With millions of Roma at the door, Islam raging in Woolwich and no prospect of heating our houses reliably within the next ten years…why, I`ve thought about Alan Turings cottages by Piccadilly Gardens constantly…and fear of drug-addled Community Paybackers ripping my open throat with a borrowed Stanley knife in the early hours was therefore not worth losing sleep over.
But-Tatchell says that he should NOT have been so targeted for his “posthumpous pardon”(anybody tell me what can be done with one of them?)…because he was …er “famous”.
And what of the others less computer-savvy then? Denis Nielson? maybe?
Of F888Off Beeb…shouldn`t Tatchell be seeking a pardon and damages from Harman, Hughes, Mellish and all the other Bermondsey bigots that destroyed his Labour candidacy in 1981?
Nah, might embarrass Michael Foot!
Radio 5 Braindead was reporting that Turing was prosecuted “for being gay”. These people are too stupid even to make into Soylent Green. Turing was prosecuted for committing homosexual acts which were illegal at the time. If he gets a pardon, then why not everyone else convicted pre 1967 of homosexual acts?
We have all forgotten about the two saints Barak Obama and Nelson Mandela. Adoration will reign forever and I am especially dreading next years anniversary of Mandela’s death.
Which reminds me:
21. There can be no legitimate opposition to the US President or any of His policies. All criticism and opposition is driven by sinister motives, especially crypto-racism.
Rule n+1: Hamas and the PA are peace-loving multiculti hippies who wouldn’t hurt a fly, especially not Jews, Christians and gays, whereas Israel is always the aggresor, oppressor, occupier and has no right to defend her citizens from attack.
Tory MP past and present should be referred to by surname only and in a disparaging voice as in..Thatcher, Cameron, Osbourne etc.
Terrorists who murder soldiers on British streets however must be referred to as ‘Mr ‘and any justification of their actions however tenuous should be put forward especially if those actions can be blamed on ‘Tory’ cuts or policies.
Re- 7.) AND 8.) above:-
“HOW SHOULD WE REMOVE ISLAM FROM BRITAIN AND THE WEST?”
Left-wingers must always outnumber right-wingers on Question Time panels for all weeks except for just two weeks in the year where the reverse shall apply – this is so that we can prove our impartiality
If there is a danger of a right-winger on the panel ending with a sensible point likely to attract a bit of clapping or sounds of approval, David Dimbleby must quickly interrupt so as to stifle the applause before it starts. However, if the left-winger is ending on a point, DD must remain silent so that the crew can capture the loud cheers and whoops and the camera operator can zoom in on a studenty type clearly showing their approval.
All discussions programmes on the BBC about the Arts must assume that all writers are on the Left, notwithstanding that most of the greatest post-war writers have either been non-political or despise the Left.
A BBC Arts programme discussion is generally three Left Wing drones fighting to over which of them is the most politically correct.
Amazon.co.uk not the BBC is the friend of anybody who wants to learn about the world. The BBC is the enemy of all independent thought.
Terrorists are militants & rioters are demonstrators.
Unemployed actors from areas near Salford who are hired to describe conditions on the ground in Syria, Lybia, Egypt, Gaza, etc. from BBC perspective are activists.
When muslims slaughter Christians it is sectarian violence. When Buddhists kill muslims we are reminded that Buddhism is not really a doctrine which eschews violence.
On point 12, have a look at 56:30 in this Panorama on the murder of Lee Rigby: http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b03qg490/Panorama_Woolwich_The_Untold_Story/
The BBC journalist is trying to suggest that, were it not for government funding cuts, the murder might have been prevented. Disgraceful!
That’s because in the BBC’s statist mind it is not the responsibility of people to behave, it is for the people to fund the state to prevent atrocities. If the government makes cuts then the government is to blame. Therefore Rigby’s murder requires the government to admit mea culpa.
On Point #11 I would add the codicil that even though public/private/grammar schools are bad and comprehensives are good, the BBC exclusively hires people who have attended public/private schools (and preferably Oxbridge) but who deem that this sort of education should not be available to the masses as it is not good for them.
Re: point 4. I am surprised at you people! Whenever Thatcher is mentioned, inform the listener/viewer that she was “divisive”.
The BBC are fed lefty employees via ads in The Guardian or via the London school of economics, There are a number of the polls the BBC refer to, all have a reliable strong left wing bias. The Labour party complain about the the cash Tories have but no amount of money is better than BBC PR 24/7
Who is the “public”, and who represent the public? as the “public”, is an entity.
In the “public’s” best interest!, What section of the “public”?
If the bbc bureaucrat’s are so worried about income, why not put it self on the competitive market, and a dreadful thought at the bbc, “compete” against other competing media’s, like a more voluntary pay you go network(as current system is enforcement), through up to date digital technology or like other Independent stations and advertise. Or does this act of notion, fear the cartel monopoly?